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April 8th, 2007
01:50 am - it's always night, or else we wouldn't need...... [01]
Boy, what a difference good lighting can make.
Just like typical me, when one of the two lights in my apartment burn out I'm left sitting in a (mostly) dark apartment for monthes. Monthes of working out in the half-dark, monthes of reading in the half-dark, monthes of trying to find my keys in the half-dark. But now, on the tail end of a week long break from school in which I did nothing but recover from a cold (second break in a row that I was sick), I'm motivated by the now spectacular 75 watt flood lighting to get my apartment, nay- my life, in order... all at midnight on a Saturday in April...... and starting by organizing my CD collection.
In fact, this isn't something entirely new (well, cleaning my apartment is)- I've actually been getting my life together, slowly and quietly, in secret (a lot like Britney Spear's secret descent into madness, only much better). Even though you'd never get me to admit it, I'm actually pretty happy and proud of myself... and since no one reads this anyway, my horrible secret is safe!
It hasn't been an easy road, and it still certainly has its peaks and valleys- but here I am, all alone on a Saturday night, sitting here with an organized CD collection, and in great lighting no less.
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: n/a
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January 3rd, 2007
05:14 pm - The Most Private Thing I'm Willing to Admit Here Is
On my first day of summer camp I lost most of my clothes.
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August 18th, 2006
03:03 pm - I Wrote Holden Caulfield
For my 11th grade Lit. class last semester I gave an OMG CREATIVE PROJECT (the holy grail of public school English), where they had to write in the voice of various characters in The Catcher in the Rye. So, like, what youre supposed to do is actually do one yourself, so the kids understand what theyre supposed to be doing. So here is ME as Holden Caulfield (ed note: I really wanted to sign the bottom with a pseudonym, like "Prof. David Andrews" or something, but I didnt think the kids would understand the reference to earlier in the book..........sigh):
Dear Journal,
I’ve been here at the rest home for three weeks now. I don’t like it too hot, if you really want to know the truth. The doctors and the people who work here look at you funny all the time, and they make you talk to them all the time. Sometimes you just don’t want to talk, and when you tell them that, they want you to talk even more.
I met a kid there today, about eight or nine years old. He wasn’t wearing shoelaces. He must be in here for stealing other kids shoelaces. Kids do that all the time, that kills me. Once when I was in school, a friend of mine kept LOSING his shoelaces. His parents had no idea where they would go. Just for the hell of it, I told the kid I was in the hospital training to be an astronaut. I didn’t feel much like getting into it, so I told the kid I had to go to the bathroom. He said good luck with becoming an astronaut. I swear, kids kill me.
I’m not going to be here much longer, really I’m not. I just have to talk to some doctors some more; it seems like they really like talking to me. I mean, I know I’m hard to talk to, but they always come to me and ask how I’m doing and what I think about different things.
-Mr. Holden Caulfield
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: "Angel of Death" - Slayer
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July 20th, 2006
02:38 am - (The Problems with) Being Johnny Tangle
“But Mom, seriously, you promised,” cried a bewildered Johnny Tangle. Mrs. Tangle gazed into her web of stringbeans, “Not tonight, Johnny, you know better… Tonight is stringbeans and meatloaf night. It has been stringbeans and meatloaf night for weeks now! You should know this, Johnny, really… and when did I ever promise McDonalds?”
His mother’s words shot through Johnny like a spear impaling a lightning bolt. When did she promise McDonalds? He was sure she did, as Dally provided a callous glance up from his muted television and MTV. But maybe, possibly, could Johnny Tangle, in a fit of deranged hunger, have imagined that his loving mother of eight (mostly) wonderful years had promised to buy him three happy meals?
( Read more... )
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/sad.gif) uncomfortable
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March 11th, 2006
11:06 pm - Dog Sandwiches
Guys- Adam just showed me this picture, and it totally scared the piss out of me! Seriously, dont let this happen to you guys! Adam said that a lot of people have been making dog sandwiches lately! Jesus Christ! That poor guy! I dont think my parents are going to eat me, but now I'm not so sure!
Jesus Christ!,
Bruiser
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11:05 pm - Jesus Christ!
I'm gonna start posting my dog's myspace messages here, because I dont want to lose them and they seriously make me laugh everytime I read one of em.
Man, I really need a life.
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December 10th, 2005
03:12 pm - King Kong? A Kong sized TURD!
Since I got to see KING KONG (directed by Peter Jackson) last night, for free, with fellow members of the academy at a private Universal screening in NYC, I feel as though it is my duty to tell my LJ faithfull that it was a KONG SIZED FART!
I have never been so let down by a movie in my life (as I missed out on the whole Episode I debacle). Everything about KONG (along with its three hour running time) is overdone, overblown, and overstated (ed note: used three "o" words for own dramatic overstatement). The so-called emotional segments of the film come off as questionable-at best, and laughable-at worst. While CG Kong looks great, everything about him looks like an N64 game- there were better looking dinosaurs in Turok, and, most certainly in Jurrasic Park.
The story comes off as vapid, and the characterization is mostly forced. The plot holes are a plently (how did they get KONG back to NYC? No matter, they dont show it). After three hours, the climax comes as a welcome end to a movie that could have stood to be an entire hour shorter. Any attempt at emotion by the climax falls flat, especially the silly shot of KONG falling off the empire state building.
The film, of course, begs the question: What killed KING KONG? After the films bloated running time, I think the answer is clear, "Peter Jackson killed King Kong".
(and, yes, there is a reference to the original, and it's pretty darn sweet).
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/smile.gif) amused
Current Music: Danzig
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October 19th, 2005
04:06 pm
just so if you're one of those people who are like all about interpreting dreams, try this one out...
so in my dream, george "the animal" steel is at the end of his career and is out of money entirely. he has taken up work doing college parties, where he entertains students by doing his old wrestling shtick, holding up signs, and as a finale "the animal" sets up a table, lights it on fire, and throws himself through it. at one party, he lights the table on fire, but it looks like it's burning too intensely. the crowd is badgering him to throw himself through it. he does, since he feels obliged, as it's part of his act. since he's also kind of scared he does it wrong, and gets caught up in the fire. his shoulder gets badly burned, and even though he is in a lot of pain, he holds up his funny "goodbye florida" sign.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/blah.gif) blah
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October 13th, 2005
05:29 pm - stupid bullshit
Here is my latest silly graduate assignment. Now, play at home and see...
1. Just how seriously I take the assignment.
and
2. Just where I stop caring entirely.
So I give you....
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How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Microsoft Word
The terror, stress, and anxiety induced from a writing assignment intended to find (and explain) a notion of meaning, or a reoccurring theme, in my own life immediately overwhelmed me. Would it be funny enough to be entertaining? Would it be interesting enough to keep people interested? Would it be meaningful enough to warrant my writing about it? My mind flooded, my heart raced; I then realized, I’ve led a very dull life. But I can write, can’t I?
( read on, cocksucker... )
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/wink.gif) giddy
Current Music: Punk Rock is Dead
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October 4th, 2005
05:20 pm - a fine line
There's a fine line between decent and bullshit. I still like this. Post-9/11, yeah yeah, fuck you.
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My grandfather was the only real local celebrity to come out of the north side of the county. He gained his notoriety by burning down an old shed on the eastern side of his two-acre estate. The wood was rotting and the foundation was cracked. The fire was spectacular.
In the days that followed the sheriff launched an investigation for arson. Hysteria gripped the town. In an effort to clear up the confusion, my grandfather explained what had happened to the police department. They accepted his explanation as an admission of guilt. He was an arsonist to the police, and the local press declared the town had been a victim of terrorism.
My mother moved us south, where there was no record of terrorist activity, to escape the stigma the public created for our family. She also had our general safety in mind, as a town without terrorism seemed like a safe place anyway.
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: Sopranos - Season III
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September 13th, 2005
01:59 am - Intro to Creative Writing
It's rare that I ever write anything that I like the next day. The only exception to this is, for whatever reason, college papers. Anything the least bit creative makes me ill upon re-reading. It's usually not even pretentious, more like wanna-be pretentious. And man, is that not the worst kind of pretentious.
There is an exception to the rule; something I wrote in 2002 for an undergrad class, which I then went on to ruin with a hideously, desperatly pretentious sequal. The hardest thing about writing anything is not to get full of your own bullshit. So I didnt write a thing until earlier this year, simply because I didnt have anything to write. Then, out of no where, a few pages came to me and I havent thought much about it since. Ah well. Here is something from that, which I still enjoy reading.. so thats something.
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I met Kristen the first autumn we were there. She was out in the senior courtyard practicing her handwriting, with the sun on her face and her left hand on her knee. I found out later that her English teacher felt her cursive R’s looked more like S’s and her S’s looked more like R’s. With R’s that looked like S’s, Kristen would write her name as “Ksiten” which didn’t make any sense, and furthermore her teacher didn’t think a person could get very far in life with a name that didn’t make sense. On a piece of notebook paper, she wrote over and over “Kristen sleeps on sand so soundly”. I sat down by her and watched. With each passing blue line she’d gaze at the sentence and sigh. She was tired, and this seemed to her as senseless torture. I didn’t want to interrupt her quiet, repetition induced fantasy. She finished the assignment, smiled at me and went to class.
Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: King of the Hill
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June 8th, 2005
06:54 pm - the little things...
BleedJoeyGore: mike loved the prid vid you gave me
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i really am a dork, cause that just made my day...
oh, and im also excited for researching and writing my 15-page grammar paper... so im a nerd too.
the little things that make life fun
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: Punk Rock is Dead - Michale Graves
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January 14th, 2005
02:01 am - high school
12th grade presented the opportunity for a lot of sillyness, which was taken more often than not. dan and I would wander the school partaking in all kinds of retardidity. It was like an all day rock-and-roll party, minus the music and plus uniforms and constraining rules.
and you had to take theology. not shop, or that silly public school cooking class (does that even really exsist?). theology is just ramming catholicism down your throat, with bible study and propaghanda. 10th grade was the new testament, and 11th was the old. In 11th grade you learn you should have really appriciated the new testament. ah well. but 12th grade theology is just straight up "Catholicism for a Practical Living" propaghanda.
So, I failed three of four quarters (and somehow passed for the year, even picking NECROPHILIA as my project on sexuality withstanding). I even remember argueing that the love of a twinkie COULD be stronger than the love of GOD for some people. I stand behind that.
and we had a term paper on Jesus, which you were supposed to be keeping up with for monthes. Research. Lotsa pages. Sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll. Well, there might have been... I didnt read the assignment sheet.
Now without any further ado, my paper...
JESUS CHRIST SURE WAS A SUPERSTAR
During his life, Jesus Christ gave of himself. He healed the sick, he fed the hungry, he even cured the seemingly incurable. Jesus did all of this with little problem, but he also gave of himself. He loved and cared about people so much that he suffered for us. Jesus took numerous beatings, whippings, cuttings, etc., you name the form of torture, theres a good chance Jesus suffered through it. He was even put to death for the people he loved.
Jesus Christ suffered. There is no doubt about it. He also healed. Just recall the story of the "10 Lepers", or when he raised his friend Lazirus from the dead, or when he turned water into wine. Each of these stories show that Jesus performed many wonderful miracles. He also always did the right thing, even if that meant making him the outcast. For example, when everyone wanted to kill Mary Magellan, Jesus stepped in with his famous phrase, "Let thee without sin cast the first stone". Jesus saved the day for Mary, saving her life. He RISKED himself to save someone else. Jesus was a hero. He suffered for us. He was nailed to a cross for our redemption. Jesus was a cool guy.
Some have referred to Jesus as a "suffering servant". This name is all too perfect for Jesus Christ. He is the son of God, our creator. A servant of God. As this servant, he suffered, he died on the cross. Few people today would want to die on a cross and suffer as much as Jesus did. Jesus was a brave, brave person. He was half human and half divine. Jesus Christ sure was a Super Star!!!
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I actually got a 60% on that. Go figure.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/thinking.gif) nostalgic
Current Music: King of the Hill
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December 5th, 2004
11:23 pm - My car freaks me out
So my car turned itself on and off a few times last night while I was sleeping. My mom came in my room at like 12:30 and was like "Your car is on". Yeah, it's weird to be woken up like that.
When I got up in the morning, it was sitting there, started in the driveway.
Weird.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/angry.gif) frustrated
Current Music: Daredeil - Director's Cut
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August 24th, 2004
06:28 pm
This is absolutely insane and, coincidentally, based out of Utah.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/energetic.gif) energetic
Current Music: Dig Up her Bones - Gotham Road (Season of the Witch 2K3 DVD)
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02:19 am
My mother always complains when I dont call the dog by his given name, and instead call him "dog" or "fucker", when she doesnt even use his me-given name "Bruiser" and instead calls him "Bruisy", which is just as annoying as it sounds.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/drunk.gif) drunk
Current Music: Lilo and Stich
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August 17th, 2004
02:22 pm
So, I havent been able to write a real update as the internet on my main computer is down, and I'm stuck with my parents 1.8 Celeron (ed note: spell check corrected this as "celery") where my patience lasts roughly fifteen minutes. A few quick notes:
-- For whatever reason, my dog, who was shitting-outside trained in about three weeks (when he was roughly two monthes old) has been crapping nightly in the living room, even after letting him out for a pre-bed time poo session. Now, although I havent caught him in-the-act yet, but rather find hidden-doodee around my couches,I am quite sure it is him (and if for whatever reason I find my dad as the poo-laying culprit, I'll keep you posted). I dont get it. Do dogs sometimes untrain themselves? Before all the weird-poo findings, he had house-poo'ed maybe five times in the year-and-a-half that I've had him. If anyones had any similer experiences, please-let-me-know.
-- OMMFG, I-love-writing-with-hyphens-.
-- I watched Hellboy last night, and really liked it. Why did everyone not-so-much like it? The gas mask nazi guy rocked, and I liked the aquatic helper friend. It was also the first movie I watched with my finally repaired and set-up surround sound system. Man, does surround sound rock. And, as much as my surround sound system rocked my balls last night.. sadly, the speaker stands I bought did not. The one by my bed broke some time during my slumber, and the speaker came crashing down, hitting me in the head. If you know how heavy one of those satilite speakers are, youll know how much that sucked. Now I regret getting Panasonic, over Sony.
Current Mood: lethargic
Current Music: ICP - Riddle Box
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zoulonfire's journal